Miscarriages and loss… are so hard
Miscarriages and loss … are so hard.
This coming week will be 2 years since I had a miscarriage. It is something that is was one of the hardest things I had to process, but truly something that God has used greatly for good.
It has given me more genuine compassion for those that have not just gone through a miscarriage but also a major life loss. I truly feel a better doctor and better person because of this experience and really feel that God uses it for His glory.
Losses in general, are great tools and great reality checks that help you realize how futile life in general is, and how not to take life and each day for granted.
You never know when things can go wrong, so enjoy every sweet moment of laughter and bliss.
In this society a miscarriage is not spoken about. It’s something that happens and then is not talked about again. Even when brought up in conversation, things get awkward fast, and again it is generally not acknowledged.
Before I experienced a miscarriage or loss, I never knew what to say when the situation arose. So instead of saying anything I said nothing.
I know it’s complicated because everyone is different and therefore deals with loss differently. But know that if someone has gone through a miscarriage or loss the best thing to say, in my opinion, is just a gentle, ‘sorry for your loss.’ You don’t have to say anything but that, and if you are comfortable enough to do so, give them a hug to let them know you care.
Please don’t say things like, oh you can always have another, or things happen for a reason. These sayings may be true but they do not ease the pain of the loss and do not acknowledge the person going through it.
If you are reading this and have experienced a great loss like a miscarriage, take heed and know that God is always with you, supporting you, and giving you peace. I encourage you to turn to him and ask him to help you through this time. I pray that God will place people in your life to give you the support you need to help you through this as well.
Other things that are helpful:
Read up on the stages of grief and how they are going to affect you. This helped me greatly as it help to confirm the feelings that I was having were normal. It also helped me also prepare for feelings that maybe around the corner.
Allow yourself to cry. It’s always better to allow yourself to experience grief in the way that is best for you. Some people cry others wail. Whatever it is for you just allow yourself to work through it. It’s so much better to allow these feelings to come out then to suppress them inwardly which can later create disease and tension.
Take Homeopathic Ignatia , this is a homeopathic remedy that is very helpful and healing in times of grief, stress and loss. In the midst of the miscarriage without this remedy, I think I might have gone out of my mind without it. It just helps to balance your emotions and allow your body to process everything. The great thing about homeopathic remedies is that they do not interact with any medication and are very safe but very effective.
My prayer is that this article will support anyone that is reading it and help you through this rough patch. May God place His angels around you and give you the peace, endurance, and comfort to get through everything. In Jesus name, Amen.
If you have any questions or need help finding Ignatia, please feel free to call our office: 704-543-5540.